Dear Bobbi,
Today is your 32nd birthday.
A few weeks ago, you spent some time going through old photographs - mostly ones of high school and college - and I found myself thinking, "how in the world could you possibly think so negatively of yourself?"
In all of the pictures you were smiling, bold, and confident; yet I can clearly remember thinking of myself as ugly, tormented, and sad. I wrote myself off back then, believing that I would never be good enough, that I was unlovable, and that I couldn't be happy. Granted, most of this nonsense was seeped in teenage angst. We had a lot of growing to do.
Our friend Mona told me that she thought we've done more with our life than lots of people our age. I reflected upon this for a while. Had we really? Mona would not lie to us, so there had to be some truth in that statement. I made a mental checklist: 1) got married; 2) had kids; 3) traveled some - not as much as I would have liked, but some; 4) received 2 BAs and a Masters; 5) spent time volunteering for causes important to us; and on and on. There is still a lot we would like to do, certainly, but there's also so much we have done. We've made an impact in many lives, though we may never know it.
I don't miss our teenage years, but I have to wonder if we'd think differently had we known everything we know now. I'd like to think that something would have stuck, but back then we were so stubborn and hard-headed that it probably wouldn't have mattered what we knew. We needed to evolve as a person and I know for a fact that we are a different person now than we were 15 years ago. You're a little more confident and bold, reflective and thoughtful, careful and less dramatic. You can admit to being wrong and can share your fears with other people.
Today your father treated you for a Chinese lunch and your fortune cookie said, "Welcome change." I can't think of a better way to start a new year than embracing the very thing most people are afraid of. There's a lot that we still want to do that we will get to do someday. Some of it will require a bit of patience and a lot of drive. You have both and you can make all of these things happen. Life is a challenge, but the sooner you realize that the only thing in your way is you, anything is possible.
Life is too short to waste on worry and negativity and much to long to reflect on your mistakes. Keep learning, keep doing, keep loving, and keep be-ing.
Here's to another 32 years.
Love, Bobbi
Today is your 32nd birthday.
A few weeks ago, you spent some time going through old photographs - mostly ones of high school and college - and I found myself thinking, "how in the world could you possibly think so negatively of yourself?"
In all of the pictures you were smiling, bold, and confident; yet I can clearly remember thinking of myself as ugly, tormented, and sad. I wrote myself off back then, believing that I would never be good enough, that I was unlovable, and that I couldn't be happy. Granted, most of this nonsense was seeped in teenage angst. We had a lot of growing to do.
Our friend Mona told me that she thought we've done more with our life than lots of people our age. I reflected upon this for a while. Had we really? Mona would not lie to us, so there had to be some truth in that statement. I made a mental checklist: 1) got married; 2) had kids; 3) traveled some - not as much as I would have liked, but some; 4) received 2 BAs and a Masters; 5) spent time volunteering for causes important to us; and on and on. There is still a lot we would like to do, certainly, but there's also so much we have done. We've made an impact in many lives, though we may never know it.
I don't miss our teenage years, but I have to wonder if we'd think differently had we known everything we know now. I'd like to think that something would have stuck, but back then we were so stubborn and hard-headed that it probably wouldn't have mattered what we knew. We needed to evolve as a person and I know for a fact that we are a different person now than we were 15 years ago. You're a little more confident and bold, reflective and thoughtful, careful and less dramatic. You can admit to being wrong and can share your fears with other people.
Today your father treated you for a Chinese lunch and your fortune cookie said, "Welcome change." I can't think of a better way to start a new year than embracing the very thing most people are afraid of. There's a lot that we still want to do that we will get to do someday. Some of it will require a bit of patience and a lot of drive. You have both and you can make all of these things happen. Life is a challenge, but the sooner you realize that the only thing in your way is you, anything is possible.
Life is too short to waste on worry and negativity and much to long to reflect on your mistakes. Keep learning, keep doing, keep loving, and keep be-ing.
Here's to another 32 years.
Love, Bobbi
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