Stories are fairly predictable to me. They always have been. I watch a movie or read a book and by about the middle, I can usually figure out how it's going to end. Much of this is because I am, in general, a good judge of character. I know if someone is kind, generous, a liar, or a no-good duster. (Couldn't resist a little nod to my novels here.)
I've always had a hard time with Josh's dad. His relationship with my sister was harmless enough at the beginning. He seemed nice, but after she got pregnant and had a baby, he became more and more toxic. He never left her side. He called constantly. He threatened suicide if she left him. As the years went on, he became less of a fixture at Mom and Dad's house and more like a tumor. He was a bad guy.
Josh texted me before he got off of work. Naomi and I were on our way to pick him up. He told me his dad wanted to have dinner with us. I balked a little inside, mostly because one: I don't like Kwang/Sam due to his history with my sister, and two: it's never so simple with Josh's dad as he has a tendency to complicate things immensely. As we drove back to my sister's house so I could pick up my rental car, I told Naomi that although he'd been making an active effort in Josh's life, I didn't feel quite right about Josh and Kwang spending so much time together. My intuition told me something was off. I did not want him taking advantage of my nephew.
Throughout dinner, I gave Kwang the benefit of the doubt. I allowed for the possibility of change. Who knows? Perhaps maybe he had really grown up. It had been years since I spent time with him. I could not, in all fairness, discount it. When the check came, I paid my share. Kwang reached for his back pocket. Then Josh took out his debit card. Kwang relaxed when Josh deposited my share into his wallet. It was perfectly choreographed, the way he scooped up the bill and Josh's card and led us to the register. I wondered how often this happened. Was Josh always paying his dad's share?
I asked Josh about it later, away from Mom (she's always loved a bit of gossip) and Dad (who still hates Kwang with a passion). He told me his dad doesn't make all that much and that it's hard for him to pay for things.
Yup, I thought. I called it.
So instead of using my sister for everything she's got, he's now moved on to his son.
I tell this story not to discourage anyone from trying to become a better person. People can, and do, change. But are there some character traits so ingrained in us we find it hard to evolve? Does Kwang choose not to change because it's just easier to use people up than it is to build up himself?
I don't have the answers. I wish I did. I'm no closer to informing you why than I was 24 years ago, when I first met him. But, honestly, I don't need to know the why. His actions speak louder than his words.
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