Here's an update for my faithful readers. I hope this doesn't become the norm. I like writing blogs as events happen. I'll try to make it short and sweet since it's really hard to type one-handed.
Robinson finished his paternity leave this week. It's nice to have the house again, but it's so hard juggling two kids. I was incredibly blessed with so many helping hands in the beginning, but now it's become so daunting. Balin's choice of sleeping place is on or with someone which means that I am probably holding this kid 18 hours everyday during the week. It's exhausting.
Luckily, Arthur has been - for the most part - really good. He's officially stopped taking naps, but is given the option just in case we had a really busy morning. He lets me nap for an hour or two here and there, but I can tell he really misses one-on-one time with me. I remind him that once Balin is older, it will be a lot easier for him and I to do things together. He's now going to the bathroom exclusively on the big potty because he made such a mess using his little potty. Pee would collect inside the potty and start to smell or he'd just miss completely and get it all over the floor. I blame the fact that he finally learned how to pee standing up.
Balin is thriving. He must mix protein packs with my breastmilk because he's so huge for a two month old. Compared to Arthur, at least, who was pretty average except for height. He has a doctor's appointment tomorrow and I'm curious to see what his weight and percentiles are. He's already pretty comfortable in 3 month clothes, and I wonder when he'll be growing out of those. He still sleeps sporadically and usually never more than 2 hours at a time, even at night. I find myself wishing the summer would zoom by so that I'll get some proper sleep. Balin still sleeps with myself and Robinson, which is not our preferred place because any slight movement wakes him up, but he's too young to let him cry it out. He's such a light sleeper that anytime we put him in the bassinet he wakes up 10 minutes later. It's just easier at this point to hold him and suffer through the next few months.
As for me, I'm often crabby and frustrated and resentful, but am constantly reminding myself how difficult life was in the beginning with Arthur and how much easier it became when he got older. I remind myself that it's bound to be the case with Balin, too. It can't take the place of sleep or achy arms and legs from holding and bouncing a baby, but it does bring me a little solace in the middle of the night when he has awaken yet again. I wish I had known when Arthur was a baby how good I had it since Robinson was in charge of getting him back to sleep at night. Now it's just me almost all the time...is it any wonder why I haven't moved Balin out? I just don't have the energy.
I've also decided to go on a 30 day sugar fast. No sweet breads, cakes, cookies, etc. for a month. I'm on day 11 and so far, things are going pretty well. I feel really good and I think I've lost a little more of the baby weight. I can't complain, though there are days when I would really, really love a cookie. Or two. Or five. In addition to the heat, baking at this point seems completely unnecessary.
The housework gets done on an as needed basis. I let the bathroom go for three weeks because I didn't have the time, energy, or desire to clean it. Finally, it got so disgusting that it had to be done. It only took about 20 minutes, but really, 20 minutes cleaning the bathroom means 20 less minutes sleeping, showering, or eating something. I'm surprised more people don't spring for maid services for new moms. It sounds like that would be more essential than newborn clothing. Let's face it, unless you have a 5 lb baby, no one needs newborn clothes for more than a few weeks.
Other than that, things are...progressing.
Blessed be.
We recently bought an ice cream maker. It was my first time making ice cream, which seems odd because who hasn't made coffee can ice cream as a kid? We chose an old fashioned vanilla recipe for the base and added peanut butter and chopped peanut butter cups before putting it into the ice cream maker.
As a Wiccan, I should be taking better care of myself. While I don't necessarily believe that my body is a temple, it is mine and I should be doing what I can to take care of it. I should meditate, I should continue to learn, I should fill my body with good foods, I should exercise, I should get enough sleep, and I should volunteer.
